Monsters like us
by Selphie Ivy
Summary: NOW CONTINUED! CHAPTER FIVE ADDED! Can a monster like Gogo really love? Perhaps there is just one boy who can make her feel like no other can. Please R&R!
1. Monsters Like Us

**Monsters like us**

**I don't know where this idea came from, but I had it one day and decided to go with it. It's difficult to gave Gogo depth, but bear with it as I believe it's an interesting perspective on her. Remember to review after! Thank you! **

Gogo's eyes flickered slowly in the morning light. She knew it was early, but she could not bring herself to open her eyes fully. There were two main reasons for this. One, Gogo Yubari never got up early for anyone except her boss, O-Ren, and even then it was one of the few things Gogo was unwilling to carry out for her. And two, Gogo knew something was wrong. Someone was beside her, and she had a bad feeling she knew who it was. She did not want to confirm her suspicions, so she simply laid there, the early sun blaring down upon her crumpled, naked form hidden under the bed sheets.

She felt movement beside her and her stomach twisted uncomfortably. Of course, she never usually felt like this. Usually, her 'friend' she had shared the night with would have been dead by now. She had killed a fair few, Gogo wasn't going to lie. After a while, they all blended into one another…they were all the same…straight black hair, an attractive face, good body…even their names had began to blend into one after a while….what did a name matter anyway? Whether his name had been Daichi or Tadao…whether he was a Kyo or a Yukio…he had slept with Gogo the same way…been killed the same way…she saw no reason to fuss over details such as names, although Gogo often remembered them all. She couldn't match a name to a face, however…and the only name that really meant anything to her was his name…the name she desperately tried to forget many times…and failed, of course.

The figure beside her moved again and Gogo clamped her eyes shut. It was him. It had to be! Gogo's heart pumped faster. She had an urge to turn over and somehow dispose of the figure…but…if it was him…

Gogo could feel her heart thumping inside her chest. If it was indeed him…she didn't want to kill him…she wanted to see his face…

Caught in a silent wave of crushing emotions she could hardly understand, Gogo's emotions battled one another to make a decision. Emotions? At one time, she believed she had none. Until he had somehow appeared within her life. Even now, she was constantly trying to forget him, erase him from her life…

About eight months ago, she believed she had succeeded. And then he had reappeared…in her bed, and once again in her heart. A cold, dead heart that felt little other than a psychotic love of violence, but a heart never less. And her heart had betrayed her; it had started to feel something more when he stepped into her life.

He hadn't stayed long. The morning after was a swirl of emotions and time. And then he was gone again. Gone from her life for eight months. Enough time for Gogo to dedicate herself entirely to serving O-Ren. Enough time for Gogo to commit herself to training with the meteor hammer she so loved, and was so skilled at. Enough time for Gogo to spend countless nights at bars and clubs; drinking cheap alcohol and picking up unlucky guys whose lives were cut short the instant Gogo chose them as her nightly 'entertainment.'

He hadn't stayed long enough. Not for Gogo. Hit by emotions she had never felt before, she remembered as he left last time, she could hardly cope, nor figure out how she felt. For a girl who spent so much of her life erasing her feelings, Gogo found it immensely hard to cope once he had evoked something within her.

And now he was back.

By now, Gogo had woken a little more, and the muggy morning-after feeling was slowly starting to vanish. She had not drunk as much as she usually did last night, and the difference to Gogo seemed quite astonishing. She could actually press her hand to her forehead without her mind screaming with the pain of it. She realized now, that-sooner or later- she would have to face him. Slowly she turned, rearranging herself under the covers so no part of her nude form was revealed as she moved. She kept her eyes shut, half hoping it would not be him, half hoping it would…

She finished turning, took a deep breath (something Gogo rarely took, nor needed) and opened her eyes.

It was him.

And he was awake. He was watching her, his dark eyes staring into Gogo's. He had the shadow of a smile on his lips.

Gogo, despite having prepared herself for the sight of him, still gave a gasp and she rose suddenly. She found herself sat up; her hand clutching a sheet to cover her chest modestly. Something she would never have bothered with in front of any of the other guys.

But this was different…he was different…

"Ah, good morning!" he said, a smile playing upon his lips. He appeared to have found Gogo's sudden movement amusing, and his eyes were upon Gogo with a look of playful mischief. "Good night last night" he added, with a small wink to Gogo, who was too stunned to see him again to reply. The boy seemed not to care that she didn't answer, however. He instead pulled himself up and sat against the headboard of Gogo's bed, and raised a hand to run his fingers through his messy morning hair.

He hadn't changed, Gogo decided as she watched him. His hair appeared to have two lives; during the day, it was sleek and straight, angled perfectly around his attractive features. But in the morning-or rather-in a morning Gogo witnessed, his hair retained its straightness, but stuck out in all directions. Either way, Gogo thought it suited him. His hair was not a pure black like every other guy she slept with; it had streaks of a lighter colour; maybe even blonde? Either way, fair from looking tacky, it made his prominently stunning features look even more eye-catching. His skin was the same as well. Not a blemish or imperfection, just perfect ivory skin. His eyes were a deep brown-so dark they almost appeared black, and-like the rest of his features-prominently Japanese. The only difference was that, every time Gogo saw him, he seemed to appear even more strikingly good-looking than the last time…

Gogo's thoughts were interrupted by him.

"So…long time no see, eh?" he had a certain accent. Maybe one from living in Tokyo for too long. Or maybe it was his own…an accent unique to him. Gogo wouldn't be surprised. Such a person as him must have unique qualities…

Gogo dragged her eyes to meet his, and suddenly she was overcome with anger.

"What are you doing here, Ryuichi?!" her harsh voice would have struck fear to the heart of any other guy who had sat in Gogo's bed like Ryuichi was now. But Ryuichi was not like any of the other guys. He tilted his head and appeared to observe Gogo's sudden rage as fairly amusing.

"Well, the usual, y'know? Do I have to explain to a girl like you what happened last night?" Ryuichi gave a laugh that Gogo did not share. "Nahh, you're not one of those innocent girls…so don't try acting like it!" he smirked and reached to his left, where there was a small bedside table with a pack of cigarettes and a lighter lying on top. He picked the pack up, pulled out a cigarette and stuck it in his mouth. Gogo watched, her heart thumping. She was trying to control her anger best she could; something she would not usually bother doing.

"You know what I meant, Ryuichi!" Gogo spat "And you can't smoke in here!" And Gogo reached across, snatching the cigarette from Ryuichi's mouth just as he was about to light it. To Gogo's rage, this only seemed to amuse Ryuichi further. He started to laugh again, but made no attempt to regain his cigarette. Gogo waited a few moments for his laughter to fade. She then stood, leaving the sheets behind and strolled across the room, depositing the cigarette in the bin. It was only after she had dropped it did she realize she was completely naked, and she could feel Ryuichi's eyes upon her. She spun round and sure enough, he was watching. What surprised her was he was looking at her face.

"Damn girl, you know how to disappoint a guy…so much for having my morning cig!" a smirk played on Ryuichi's lips. Gogo suddenly felt very self conscious; an experience she was not at all used to. She couldn't even remember the last time she felt self conscious…had she ever? She didn't usually care about walking around naked in her room in the morning. If the guy she had slept with the night before-that's if, of course, he was still alive- was watching, Gogo didn't give a damn. So what if they saw her naked? They'd be dead soon, anyways.

But this felt different. Maybe it was because she had no intention of killing Ryuichi (although she probably should.) Ryuichi seemed to sense her sudden awareness of her naked form, and his eyes shifted away from her completely; perhaps the kindest thing Gogo had ever witnessed him do. She slithered back towards the bed and pulled the covers over herself again. She had never felt as hopeless and lost as she did right now. What had happened to her? The guy would be dead and gone by now, if it had been any other guy. But this was Ryuichi…and he was anything but ordinary…

As Gogo repositioned herself on the bed, Ryuichi turned back to her. "I guess last night was simply chance…I never thought I'd see you again, Aimi…"

Aimi?

Gogo's insides gave an unpleasant twist.

"Aimi?! How dare you!" Gogo cried, but yet again Ryuichi did not shudder.

"Yup, Aimi," he repeated calmly "why, you got a different name now?"

Gogo's face twisted into a look of anger.

"My name is Gogo Yubari! I have never heard of this Aimi!! Gogo turned to Ryuichi, and for lack of better words repeated "How dare you!"

"Hmmm….I was under the impression your name was Aimi Yubari, unless- of course- I'm getting you confused with someone else" Ryuichi's eyes told Gogo he didn't believe he had gotten it confused at all.

For once in her life, Gogo had no words to say.

"I…I…"

"changed your name," Ryuichi finished coolly, reaching for another cigarette "which is a pity…Aimi was such a pretty name…for such a pretty girl" Ryuichi gave a wink and reached across to stroke Gogo's cheek. Gogo recalled from his touch as though he had come at her with a weapon. Ryuichi gave a small laugh.

"Scared of my touch? What happened to the fearless Aimi I once knew? Or maybe even this new girl…Gogo, do you call her? I've heard about Gogo, actually. I've heard she's quite a character. Hardly speaks, kills like crazy…complete psycho really"

This news didn't seem to affect Ryuichi at all. He gave a small wink to Gogo, who was sat paralyzed in her position by his words.

"I even heard that every guy who sleeps with her mysteriously disappears the day after…hmmm…better watch my back," Ryuichi seemed completely unconcerned as he reached for his lighter "still, I done it twice before and I'm still alive, so hey, third time lucky, eh?" he shot Gogo a smirk as he lit his cigarette. Gogo finally regained her voice.

"Yeah well, there's nothing special bout you! You wait! I'm gonna kill you too! And don't you ever call me that…that name again!"

"What, Aimi? What's wrong with that? It is your name, right?"

"Not anymore!" Gogo shrieked, Ryuichi was seriously testing her nerves. If any other had spoken to her like this, they would have been in eight parts by now…

"Well, at least you admit it was your name once," Ryuichi said with a sigh "such a pretty name…" he repeated, apparently to himself. Gogo had started to regain her voice.

"Well, I want you out of here right now!" she cried.

Ryuichi did not move.

"And why is that, Aimi?"

"Because…because!" Gogo spluttered to find a reason. What was wrong with her?! She never acted like this! "Because you should! You walked out of my life eight months ago, and I see no reason for you to re-enter it!"

"Is that so?" Ryuichi questioned calmly, taking a drag from his cigarette "I believe I have every reason to be in your life, Aimi"

"My name is not Aimi!" Gogo screamed "And I told you, no smoking!" Gogo thrust herself across the bed and attempted to snatch the cigarette from Ryuichi's lips. He, however, was too quick and ducked out of the way. Gogo landed right on top of him. She was surprised to find he was not as naked as she had believed him to be; he was wearing black boxers.

"No need to leap on me, despite how good I look, Aimi" Ryuichi said with another smirk and a wink. Gogo-her body pulsing with rage-knew she was getting nowhere, at least in this state. She stepped down from the bed angrily and approached her underwear drawer, pulling out a plain black bra and pants. She put them on quickly and turned back to Ryuichi. He was still smoking.

Gogo strolled to the bed, she raised her hand and there was a sudden smack. Ryuichi's face was turned from the impact of Gogo's slap, but when he turned to face her again, he looked neither angry nor hurt.

"Nice slap Aimi, you sure are a feisty one, eh?"

At this Gogo lost her temper. She gave a small scream before thrusting herself at Ryuichi again. This time, her attempt was more successful as she seized the cigarette. Half on top of him, Gogo grabbed Ryuichi's hand and yanked it towards her. Ryuichi suddenly gave a yell; Gogo had thrust the still-burning cigarette into the palm of his hand in order to extinguish it. Ryuichi rose and Gogo fell sideways, unable to balance herself. She was still clutching Ryuichi's burned hand and he followed her; they both hit the floor with a thud. Ryuichi was the first to recover. He towered over Gogo with a different expression of his face from those previously; he was angry now. The look on his face was so intense, for the first time in her life, Gogo was truly scared.

"You can be a right bitch at times, Aimi" Ryuichi said. Gogo said nothing. She simply watched him tower over her; her eyes wide and fearful. She could see where she had burnt his hand; it was as though she had smeared black coal around a deep cut which was sore and bleeding. Gogo felt a small twinge of an emotion within herself; regret? Pleasure? Even Gogo did not know at this point.

Nothing happened for about ten seconds, and then-without a word- Ryuichi turned and headed towards Gogo's bathroom. Gogo stayed where she was. She could hear the tap running. After about four minutes Ryuichi re-entered the room. His hand where Gogo had attacked him was now bandaged roughly with some cheap bandage Ryuichi must have found in Gogo's cupboard. Gogo did not move as he approached.

"You gonna get up?" Ryuichi asked her, and Gogo was surprised to find his tone of voice did not seem as angry as he had appeared to be a few moments ago. Gogo did not bother replying. She knew she must look pathetic, just lying there. Suddenly, she felt Ryuichi's hand upon her wrist, and he was pulling her up.

"Get off!" Gogo cried, but she had no strength to push him away. He yanked her upwards and suddenly she was upon the bed again. She suddenly felt incredibly drained. She swore, and Ryuichi gave a small chuckle. It was as though the incident a few moments ago had never happened. Gogo lay on the bed, breathing heavily as though she'd just run a marathon. She turned her face to the side and closed her eyes; wishing the world would fade away and leave her alone. Why had he come back? Why was he next to her now?

She felt him above her, but she clamped her eyes tighter; she had never felt so vulnerable in her entire life. She felt Ryuichi's lips upon her cheek, and then her neck. The very fact she could reach out with one hand and kill him was destroyed by the fact she had no wish to…for once…

Ryuichi's hands were in her hair now, and his lips upon hers. Gogo always remembered his kisses; they were so passionate, and had a bittersweet taste. His lips were surprisingly dry. Gogo kissed him back then realized what she was doing. In shock, she pulled away quickly, and her hands-likely due to habit- swung out and hit Ryuichi. He fell back against the bed again, this time a clear mark already on his face from the impact; it would most certainly grow to a bruise that would mark his perfect ivory skin for a while.

Gogo sat up, unsure what to say or do. Ryuichi-looking a little surprised- reached up to the side of his head and felt it, as if to confirm the damage. A few moments past, with both Gogo and Ryuichi silent; Gogo on the bed, Ryuichi sat away from her, his hand still upon the place she had struck him. Gogo had never felt such a strange atmosphere. Finally, Ryuichi shattered the silence.

"Fine"

It was such a simple word, but Gogo suddenly felt confused; what did he mean?

"Fine" Ryuichi repeated, and Gogo watched as he rose from the bed. He walked round the side of her and began to gather his clothes from where they had fallen the previous night. Gogo watched him; a sinking feeling in her stomach.

He was leaving. This was it.

Gogo watched silently as Ryuichi changed. He pulled on a pair of faded jeans and a cool white shirt. He combed his hair and it seemed to obey him; it straightened slightly over his attractive features. Gogo watched as he pulled on socks. His shoes were by the door. Ryuichi turned to Gogo's full-length mirror and observed himself. He was flawless, Gogo realized, except for the darkening bruise near his eye where Gogo had smacked him, and his bandaged hand.

If it was not for Gogo, he would have been flawless. Perfect.

And now he was leaving Gogo again.

Ryuichi turned to the door without even a backwards glance at Gogo. He reached the door and was about to pull on his shoes when Gogo stood.

"Wait!" she cried, and had this been a romance, Gogo would declare her love for Ryuichi and he would return it; and they would both live happily ever after.

But Gogo did not believe in happily ever after.

"You forgot your cigarettes" Gogo muttered, holding them out in her hands but not approaching Ryuichi.

"Keep them" Ryuichi replied impassively.

"I quit smoking"

Ryuichi glanced up suddenly at Gogo.

"Really?!"

"Yeah…and?"

Ryuichi gave a small shrug.

"Even Aimi smoked at one point, I just didn't think you'd ever quit…well, keep 'em anyways…"

"What? Why?!" Gogo asked, frowning at Ryuichi with a look of scorn.

Ryuichi stared back, unfazed.

"You're gonna need something in your life…I guess smoking is a good way to pass the time…"

"Excuse me?" Gogo spat in surprise

Ryuichi leaned against the door.

"I'm going now, Aimi…and…looks like I ain't gonna be coming back…so don't wait up for me…I'm just saying…once I'm gone, you're gonna need something to give your life meaning, right?"

Gogo swore.

"I mean, at least before-deep down- you knew I'd be coming back to you, whether it be eight days or eight months...and I did, didn't I?"

Gogo swore again, her mouth getting fouler as she became more frustrated. Ryuichi ignored her words.

"Well, I'm not coming back…so you're gonna need the cigarettes I think…keep the lighter too, Aimi. Well, I'm off now…"

Gogo lost her temper and flung the cigarette packet across the room. Ryuichi dodged and it hit the wall and fell to the ground. There was another silence. Then Ryuichi asked something that Gogo believed would be his last concern right now.

"Do you know what day it is today?"

"I don't know or care!" Gogo replied angrily

"It's a Sunday" Ryuichi replied

"Why should I care?!" she spat back, and then she swore again

"It's November, Aimi…" Ryuichi trailed off, looking at Gogo expectantly, but Gogo had no time to shout at him for calling her Aimi again

"It's the 9th today…don't you remember?"

Gogo closed her eyes. A headache was clouding her mind. She felt nauseous and uncomfortable. Ryuichi was watching her. Suddenly it occurred to Gogo why Ryuichi was telling her this. Her stomach twisted and she turned from him and lowered her head.

"Happy birthday, Aimi…sorry I didn't get you a present"

Gogo had forgotten completely. It was her 18th birthday today…the 9th of November…

"I don't care about my birthday," Gogo muttered "I never celebrate it anyway…"

She turned back to Ryuichi in time to see him brushing his hair away from his face. Her mind felt miraculously clearer than it had been only moments ago.

Ryuichi shrugged

"Fair enough, at least you got a 'happy birthday' though, right?"

Gogo did not reply. Why did Ryuichi talk like this? He was different from any other guy she'd known…slept with…killed…she's never met another like him, and she doubted she ever would.

"I don't need a 'happy birthday'…who cares? It's only another day" and she turned from him. Ryuichi understood. It was time for him to leave now, for real…

"Well, happy birthday again, Aimi. I hope you have a wonderfully meaningless life; screwing all the guys you want and killing them after…and don't forget drinking yourself to death…"

Ryuichi finished tugging on his shoes. Gogo turned back round but he had already opened the door.

She watched him leave.

There was a faint click as the door shut. He had gone. Again. And he wasn't coming back this time…

Gogo sat back down on her bed. She was still in her underwear, and her heart was thumping inside her chest. Time seemed to pass effortlessly, but Gogo was very aware that every second that passed, Ryuichi was one step further away from her; a step further out of her life.

Gogo closed her eyes, trying to ignore the strange feeling she had.

There would be other guys like him, right? There were so many guys in Tokyo; good-looking, athletic, charming…

But not Ryuichi.

Nobody could ever be Ryuichi, because he was so unique. Deep down she knew, she would never find one like him again. He'd slipped away, through her fingers again.

Again?

Why had she let him go? Why had she let this happen again? Was she that stupid…could she not learn from her mistakes?

She remembered then-suddenly- something that Ryuichi had said to her when they had encountered one another eight months ago. They had argued much like now, of course, and Gogo had said something about how she was a crazy bitch who he should be scared of, and he was an arrogant selfish playboy. But then he had said something; his reply had stuck within her mind since;

"Even though we are both little more than monsters of humanity…do you not think we can love? Can two fiends like us not find each other and be happy? Think about it!"

And this-to Gogo- had been something she could not forget. It seemed so poetic-especially for a guy who appeared to care as much for poetry as he did sexual chastity.

And now he was gone; only his words remained.

Gogo sprung up from her bed suddenly. She knew what she had to do. She sprinted across her room and pulled open the door. Her apartment was on the tenth floor of the building yet she had always taken the stairs; it was good exercise. And she wasn't going to stop now. She flung herself at the stairwell, her long black hair flying behind her and she bounded down the steps. She had never come down these stairs so quickly.

Gogo reached the ground floor and tugged open the final door which was the only separation between herself and the streets of Tokyo. Outside, Gogo finally realized her attempts were futile. Tokyo had been awake for hours (that is if you could ever say it slept) and the streets were crowded with people going about their everyday lives.

Ryuichi was nowhere to be seen.

She stood and stared out into Tokyo; the city was alive with life right in front of her; so why did it feel so dead?

Suddenly, she became aware that a few people passing were staring strangely at her. She was still wearing nothing but underwear. Not embarrassed at all, Gogo turned on her heel-ignoring the whispers around her- and re-entered her apartment building.

She started to re-climb the stairwell with an empty feeling. She was angry with herself; she should have known that Ryuichi would disappear. I mean, look at herself…she was a monster…Ryuichi deserved better than her…though he two was hardly a saint…

She reached the tenth floor and slowly walked to her apartment door. Her life felt beyond meaningless now; the feeling was ten times worse than when Ryuichi had left her last time.

She reached her door and could immediately see something was different. On the door- attached with a thumbtack- was a small, folded piece of paper. Gogo slowly reached out, unpinned it and read;

_Aimi,_

_Even though we are both little more than monsters of humanity, did you not think I could fall for you?_ _Two fiends like us have found one another, finally._

Slowly, Gogo unfolded the paper and read on. The inside had only one line;

_Think about it_

Gogo stared at the note for just under a minute. She did not move a muscle nor give any signal she had even understood Ryuichi's words.

After a minute had passed, Gogo refolded the note as though nothing had happened and re-entered her apartment. She placed the note on her bedside table and sat down on the bed again. She needed to shower.

Gogo stared at the note. It was like it was watching her, watching for a reaction. She stood and undressed; the shower was waiting for her. But as she entered the shower and let the warm water wash away the dirt, she encountered something she had never felt before. A sense of purpose in her life.

This is not to say that Gogo was enlightened, nor that she would start leading a good life. She would still drink and fight and kill and wake up next to a guy.

The only difference was that it would be Ryuichi.

After all, didn't two monsters; however cruel or sadistic they both may be- deserve some form of happiness, some purpose in their otherwise meaningless lives?

It was all possible now, for Ryuichi had left her one last gift on his note; her birthday present. One last way to show her he really did care, and he was planning to see her again.

He had left his phone number.

**As I said before, this kind of story is very difficult to write; how can you give Gogo such deep emotions such as love? So I tried to convey that Gogo and Ryuichi share not quite a love as such-but a bond which ties them together. I don't know if Gogo can love, but if she could, she would share a love-hate relationship with Ryuichi. I tried to convey her confusion and frustration with her feelings for Ryuichi by showing her acting violently towards him, whether or not you agree that she would act this way is a personal choice :) Please leave reviews telling me what you thought! This is my first fanfic after about a year break from writing so please don't be too cruel with me! lol **

**Selphie Ivy**

**Disclaimer: I do not own Kill Bill or Gogo...but I invented Ryuichi so I do own him! haha**


	2. An Encounter

**I haven't written fan-fiction for over a year, and 'Monsters like Us' I always intended to be a one-shot, but after such a break inspiration suddenly struck me and I found myself writing this. I may consider writing more of Gogo and Ryuichi, if you want to read more, please tell me! I'd appreciate any reviews, thanks everyone.**

A Encounter

By Selphie Ivy

In, out, in, out.

Ryuichi was breathing his cigarette in rhythmically, his body slack and loose, leaning against the back alley wall. It was late. Really late. But Ryuichi's job meant he often worked all night. He took another drag of the cigarette. Why was tonight dragging on so much?

He finished the cigarette and threw it onto the floor, standing up straight and stretching as he did so. He drew out another cigarette and was about to light it when the door next to him flew open and a figure appeared.

"Dude, what the hell are you doing? You were meant to be back five minutes ago! Get back inside!" It was Ryuichi's co-worker, Makoto.

"I don't wanna work, Makoto, I don't give a shit anymore" Ryuichi replied nonchalantly. He lit his cigarette and took another drag. Makoto frowned. He was Ryuichi's friend, but he did think he was a pain in the ass sometimes.

"If you're not back in here in thirty seconds, I'll have to tell Osamu…and remember what happened to that host a week ago who didn't do what Osamu said?" Makoto mimicked a punch to the face. Osamu was their boss, and only the other week a host had been sent home copiously bleeding from the head after apparently disobeying his rules. Nobody knew quite what the host had done, nobody had even seen Osamu pulp him, but it was a rumour that had spread throughout the host club and Osamu had done nothing to deny it, this was, after all, one of the dodgier host clubs in the heart of Tokyo's underbelly.

Unwilling to receive a punch, Ryuichi gave a small growl and threw his cigarette to the floor in annoyance, before following Makoto back into the host club. Ryuichi had worked there for almost seven months. The first six had been the thing of his dreams. Flirting with rich, beautiful women, being admired for his good looks, drinking, smoking, seducing a few of the more famous or beautiful clients. But the last month had been monotonous and dull. No matter how many beautiful women he saw, he could only think of one, and he hadn't taken a girl home since that fateful night when he had slept with Aimi, although many since had made it clear that they wanted to sleep with him. Ryuichi approached Osamu, who snapped at him for taking too long with his breaks before directing him to the entrance, where a young female had just picked Ryuichi off of the 'menu.'

Easily one of the best-looking hosts in the host club, Ryuichi was fairly used to being fawned over by females, especially new ones who frequently wanted to choose Ryuichi as their host. Ryuichi gave a sigh and headed over, trying to hide his disappointment; he had hoped to be able to come in and slump himself in a corner for ten minutes or so, away from the adoring eyes of the clients. How had he never noticed how boring they were, when he compared them to Aimi?

He reached the new female and forced a smile, and started to enter all the formalities that a host most perform. Five minutes later they were seated, with drinks flowing. Ryuichi was pouring his client copious amounts of alcohol, which she was devouring eagerly in between scrutinizing Ryuichi's face. She was pretty, Ryuichi supposed, with a slim body encased in a small dress. She had long dark hair and a big smile. Apparently she was an actress but Ryuichi wasn't bothering to listen to the TV show synopsis shit that she kept repeating. She chatted away and repeatedly stroked Ryuichi's arm. Trying to pretend to be listening, Ryuichi looked around at the other hosts and clients who were sharing the seating space with them. Makoto was there, flirting animatedly with a girl with short, choppy hair and an even shorter skirt. Hachiro was there too, Ryuichi's main rival. If a girl wasn't going to pick Ryuichi off the menu, she'd most likely pick Hachiro. They had been rivals ever since Ryuichi had overtaken Hachiro as the most popular host. Month by month, their popularity varied slightly, leaving it impossible to tell who was more frequently top. Beating Hachiro had once been Ryuichi's main goal in life. Now it seemed so meaningless. Hachiro had dyed blonde hair and perfect boy band looks. As Ryuichi looked over he responded with a cold glare that Ryuichi returned. Hachiro had his arm around a model-type girl, who was clearly very drunk and twirling his hair around her fingers. There were many others in the club too, music was blaring and people were dancing, chatting and laughing loudly. Ryuichi started to feel a headache. He pressed his hand to his forehead and almost immediately the girl he'd been with, Yumi, pressed her hand over his.

"Do you have a headache?" she simpered, in an annoying girly voice "would you like to go somewhere quieter?" she suggested, with a non-subtle wink, pointing to the door which lead to the alley outside, in which Ryuichi had just taken a break.

"Sure" Ryuichi responded, eager to be away from the excessive noise, if nothing else. Yumi threaded her hand into his and strutted away, half-dragging Ryuichi away. The outside air felt cool and fresh. Ryuichi tugged his arm away as gently as he could, as not to cause offence, and adjusted his collar. His suit could get quite stuffy. He loosened his tie. Yumi was watching him flirtingly. Ryuichi was desperate for her not to pounce on him. Quickly, he asked her "so why did you come here?"

Yumi look surprised by the sudden question. She bowed her head and mumbled something about some ex-boyfriend.

"Your boyfriend dumped you? Why?"

Yumi looked upset. She shuffled her feet slightly.

"He said I never had enough time for him…I came here cuz…cuz…I just wanted to feel loved…" she mumbled, before bursting into tears. She flung herself at Ryuichi, who wasn't expecting it. He managed to keep his balance and gingerly patted her on the head. After a minute she stopped crying and stepped away, wiping her eyes on the back of her hand.

"Have you ever loved a girl?" Yumi suddenly asked. Ryuichi opened his mouth then shut it, not knowing what to say.

"I ask cuz…I don't know…I don't know what hosts think about girls…do they ever fall in love…?"

A picture of Aimi flashed so clearly in Ryuichi's mind he was unable to speak for a moment. Perhaps Yumi read it in his eyes. She gave a small smile. Ryuichi decided it was time to speak up.

"Why don't you get out of here, go to your ex-boyfriend's place, and say sorry. Then arrange to do something together, I'm sure that'll make you feel better than this crappy place…"

Yumi gave a weak smile and nod.

"I'll do that," she said. She opened the door to the club, but before she left she paused.

"The girl you really love is lucky indeed…I hope she knows how much you love her…" And then Yumi disappeared back into the club. Ryuichi's heart was pounding but he didn't know why. A few moments passed before he felt he could gather himself enough to re-enter the club. Yumi had disappeared.

Ryuichi swiftly made his way over to the male washroom before Osamu could intercept him. He almost threw himself at the sink and almost vomited. He took a few deep breaths and then glanced into the mirror above the sink. His hair had gone a bit wild. He hastily tried to pat it down. The rest of his face was perfect, well, almost perfect. The bruise Aimi had inflicted had pretty much faded, but the thought of it brought the memory of it all fresh to Ryuichi's mind. He raised his hand and saw the cigarette burn scar Aimi had been so kind as to furnish him with.

Why hadn't she called? It was a question that had consumed him completely for the last month. He had left his number and everything…he had expected a wait of a week or so, but a month? Aimi clearly wasn't interested, he should forget her.

But he couldn't.

Running his fingers through his hair, he remembered Yumi's word, and a pain in his chest suddenly stung him. He had loved Aimi, and yet again she had betrayed him, left him waiting…

His thoughts were interrupted by Makoto, who came stumbling into the washroom, apparently searching for him.

"Akira…Osamu wants you…some girl's insisting to see you…right crazy bitch by the looks of it…I'd watch out if I were you!" Akira was the fake name Ryuichi had joined the club under. The falseness of his life hit him hard in that moment. His head swam with bitter thoughts, and he snapped back at Makoto;

"If she's had too much to drink send her home! I don't know what Osamu is playing at!" This was really not the time to be dealing with some obsessive drunk fan girl of his, not when he felt so utterly shit.

"No man, it's not that…come on…" and Makoto dragged Ryuichi out of the washroom, across the club and to the entrance, where a gaggle of waiting girls were giving a wide berth to a lone girl Ryuichi couldn't see clearly.

"She's one crazy bitch, but she's definitely a hottie. Look at that body!" Makoto said as they approached. Ryuichi was within tree metres of the girl when he realised. His heart skipped a beat. All sounds in the room seemed to fade as he looked upon the face he thought he'd never see again.

Aimi.

Or as she called herself, Gogo.

Makoto dragged Ryuichi within a metre of Gogo and deposited him with a smirk. The gaggle of girls who had been standing clear of Gogo started whispering and giggling, pointing rapidly at Ryuichi. Normally Ryuichi could not have helped but return a few smiles at them, maybe a wink or two whilst deciding which was the most attractive and therefore which one he would most prefer to seduce, but tonight he only had eyes for Aimi.

Aimi, despite having obviously come here to seek him out, did not look incredibly pleased to see him. She was wearing her usual Japanese schoolgirl outfit, and had he arms folded, as though the lack of a weapon in either hand was discerning and uncomfortable to her. She cast him a surly look and then beckoned to him irritably. She had obviously chosen him as her host. Silently, she past him and then proceeded into the club, with only an irritable beckon for him to follow. The females waiting seemed to think this was nothing short of an illegal offence, to treat Ryuichi- the popular host- in such a rude manner, and many were casting Gogo mean glares, which Gogo returned in such a cold, deadly manner that they quickly looked away.

Ryuichi hastened to follow Gogo and as he approached he felt her hand glide silently into his to hold his hand. Despite this act of apparent sensitivity, Gogo's grip was vice-like and within ten seconds Ryuichi had lost most of the feeling in the tips of his fingers. Gogo lead him through the crowds to the back of the club, where there were private booths, enough for two people. They entered one, Gogo retaining a firm grip and each took a seat, as though to come here had been a plan they had arranged a while ago.

Once sat, Gogo let go of Ryuichi's hand and he massaged it, trying to let it regain feeling again. Neither of them spoke for a moment. Gogo was not even looking at him, she may as well be sat alone.

"So…" began Ryuichi awkwardly, after it was clear Gogo wasn't about to speak "you got my number, then?"

"Yeah"

"Yet…you didn't call me…" Ryuichi said, trying to keep his voice calm and collected, though his heart was pounding rapidly in his chest.

"I've been busy"

"Oh…right…but, if you only knew my number, and you didn't bother calling me…how did you find me here?"

"I used every phoney name I knew you'd ever used or would use, went through the phone book, matched the name and number, then after confirming your fake name, researched it online and found you worked here. Then I called and asked which nights you worked, and then I've been coming here a few times when you weren't working to check it out…Akira…" she gave a small smirk of contempt at his fake name.

"What?" Ryuichi cried "how many times did you come before now?" Gogo gave a small shrug.

"Once or twice, the third time I came a night when I was told you were working, but when I arrived you were nowhere to be seen. They'd given me the wrong night, and on top of that, they wanted to stay anyway and have this other host…Kentaro or Ken his name was, or something equally ridiculous…I wasn't too pleased about being placed with him, if I'm honest…"

Ryuichi remembered Kentaro, he was a popular host here, he was the one who'd been sent away about a week ago, after being pulped by Osamu…

Ryuichi slowly turned to Gogo.

"Wait…Aimi…you didn't…?"

"It's Gogo, and yes I did, do you really blame me?"

"We all through it was Osamu who had beaten him up!" Ryuichi cried. Gogo gave a shrug.

"Well, it wasn't, I beat him up, but I wasn't that cruel…after all, it wasn't really his fault, even if he was a slimy little thing…like most hosts it seems…" Gogo said, casting Ryuichi a cold look.

"Why didn't Osamu have you banned?" Ryuichi asked, still in a state of shock.

"Cuz making his hosts think he did it makes him seem more fearsome and earns him some respect, it's not like he'd know it was me anyway, but after realising he'd never catch the person, he decided to take the blame himself…boast his rep, you know?"

"And you're not worried you'll be found out?"

"Nope," said Gogo nonchalantly "Osamu thinks it could only be a guy who inflicted the wounds, cuz they were so vicious…he greatly underestimates the power of a female schoolgirl who's angry. Oh, and Ken-boy isn't exactly gonna be telling on me anytime soon. He knows that he'll get what's coming if he does"

Ryuichi sat gaping for a moment at Gogo's fearlessness; he really had never met anyone like her.

"Gonna get me a drink?" Gogo demanded seconds later. With a nod, still unable to speak, Ryuichi departed, returning moments later with champagne and two glasses.

"Bit up-market for a fancy gigolo club" Gogo commented, as Ryuichi placed them on the table.

"Shit, Gogo, this isn't a fancy gigolo club. It's a host club."

"Oh, and how many of the girls do you screw for payment?" Ryuichi's cheeks flushed.

"I don't screw any girls for payment…and…" he checked that their booth was completely cut off from earshot before leaning forward a little "I haven't actually screwed anyone since…since that night…" he finished unsteadily, and quickly busied himself with pouring the drinks.

Gogo gazed it him for a moment. It was almost as if his words had actually taken her by surprise.

"Really…?" she muttered in a low voice. Ryuichi gave a curt nod. Gogo considered him for a few moments longer, her eyes raking his facial features clearly, before reaching to his hand and pulling it towards her. She inspected the cigarette burn carefully. Ryuichi watched her dark brown eyes and tried to stop his heart beating so fast. After a few seconds, Gogo dropped his hand upon the table.

"Sorry," she said curtly "sorry I burnt your hand…and bruised your face…" she finished uneasily. She rarely, if ever, apologised. Ryuichi gave a smile.

"What's that for?" Gogo said sharply, seeing him smile. "I still can kill you in one stroke you know!" and directing his gaze to her lower body she raised her skirt a little and gave him a glimpse of a strap around her leg and the knife that was fastened to it. Ryuichi grinned wider.

"Nice legs" he grinned, before he could stop himself. Gogo was upon him in seconds, her hand around his throat, her knee to his crotch.

"Alright, alright…" Ryuichi choked, with Gogo's hand clamp exhausting his breath "S…sorry!" Gogo's hand let go, and she moved back to her seat. She was immeasurably fast, Ryuichi noted. It was moments like that in which Ryuichi was reminded that he was hanging out with a dangerous predator, a girl who could kill him within seconds if she so wished. How could a girl so beautiful be so deadly? In her company, he often forgot that killing was her job, until she pulled some crazy stunt like she just had…

Ryuichi massaged his neck where Gogo's hands had tightened around it saw Gogo staring coldly at him. She had a dark history, he knew that. She had killed…well…the number was inconceivable to Ryuichi, yet she hadn't killed him…why? She had plenty of opportunities, and the most martial arts Ryuichi had ever studied was one ill-conceived class of boxing, in which he had quit after seeing how much a punch could bruise. He valued his good looks too much for shit like that. Better to survive in the underbelly of Japan, a good looking host in a dodgy club, than lie beaten in the boxing ring, his attractive looks long gone. Yet look at Gogo…perfect body, perfect face. No bruises, no blemishes. She was…perfect…

"What?" Gogo said abruptly. Ryuichi had been staring.

"Nothing" he said quickly. He had to do something, anything. He leaned into Gogo. She stiffened slightly but did not move away.

"Aimi…did…did that night mean anything…anything…at all to you?"

Gogo stared straight ahead for a moment, but when she faced Ryuichi she looked faintly angry.

"How dare you…how dare you insult…"

"No, no…always hiding behind your anger, always having to be angry. It's ok to be angry, but you have other emotions, I know you do." In a brave and stupid move, Ryuichi moved his hand to rest over hers. He half expected physical pain within seconds, but it never came. Instead, Gogo's hand lay motionless underneath his. Her mouth formed words she could not speak, could not say out loud. Ryuichi was perhaps the only person in the world, other than her beloved master O-Ren, who could understand her at this moment.

In a flurry of movement, Ryuichi's lips were upon hers and she was kissing back, more passionately than she had ever kissed before. His hands moved to her face and cupped it, her hair brushing against his hands. That moment was like heaven to Ryuichi, to feel her lips against his and to have her kissing him back as she never had dared to before. It was a few moments before they broke apart. Ryuichi could see something he had never seen before in her eyes. They were usually so full of anger, but now, he could see a distant longing. In seconds that was gone, to be replaced by her usual cold stare, but he would not forget it, and he clasped her tightly.

"Aimi, please, don't ignore me like you have been again. I can hardly stand it"

Gogo made no reply. Ryuichi was aware that he was the one clutching Gogo, she was making minimum effort hugging him back, but at that moment he didn't care.

"Say what you want now, Aimi"

"I want you….to call me Gogo" Gogo said breathlessly "not Aimi"

"Why?" asked Ryuichi in desperation.

"Because…Gogo is my assassin name. Only call me Aimi when…when we're alone together, not in public…"

"In…in private…?" Ryuichi asked, barely daring to believe his ears.

"Yes, you can call me that tonight, when we get to yours" Gogo's eyes were appraising him. It was clear what she wanted, even if she wouldn't say it, in fear of betraying weakness or softness. But Ryuichi knew that she wanted him. Physically or emotionally, he wasn't quite sure, but he could see it in her eyes. An outsider would say Gogo's eyes contained no emotion, no passion at all. But Ryuichi knew that that was Aimi's way. And he knew what she was thinking.

With a slight smile, Ryuichi stood and beckoned to Gogo. Together they slipped out of the booth, checked the coast was clear then slipped through the back door of the club, Ryuichi not even considering the punishment he may receive from Osamu later, for he couldn't miss this for anything, and started walking to Ryuichi's flat.

They walked side by side but made no sound, no attempt to talk until they reached Ryuichi's apartment blocks. He used the key and made his way in, Gogo silently following. His flat was on the seventh floor. They took the lift and as it moved off, Ryuichi noticed Gogo rearranging her skirt and a wave of longing shot through his body. They reached the seventh floor and walked along the corridor. Ryuichi opened his door, let Gogo through and locked it behind them. The two lovers said nothing else upon gaining entry. There were no need for words. Ryuichi could remember the feel of her body against his, and afterwards, as they lay naked together, he drew her close and kissed her forehead. She had fallen asleep on his chest, her dark fanned out, her face containing none of the contempt and viciousness that it did when Aimi was awake and conscious.

"Aimi" he whispered. He wanted to say more, he wanted to say those three words that could make her realise how much he cared, but he knew now wasn't the time, so instead he watched her as she peacefully slept. Or at least, she appeared to be sleeping, but Ryuichi could have sworn that a small smile appeared on her lips for a moment as he said her name. If he did not tell her he loved her, he may regret it for the rest of his life.

But now was not the time. He knew it wasn't. Pressing his lips once again to Aimi's forehead he closed his eyes and slowly drifted off.

**I haven't posted anything here for more than a year, so it's quite a step for me to be back here writing again after such a massive break. I hope you enjoyed it and please review! I'd really appreciate that.**

**Selphie Ivy**


	3. Origins

Monsters Like Us: chapter 3

Origins

By Selphie Ivy

**Please review at the end, with feedback I'll more more encouraged to get out the next parts as soon as possible. Thank-you.**

It was summertime. Ryuichi was six years old, sat in the backyard of the orphanage. He was lazily pushing himself back and forth on the old, rusty swings that had been there for years. Ryuichi had been here as long as he could remember. He was wearing an old t-shirt and khaki shorts. His leg was covered with plasters where he'd fallen over. The orphanage wasn't too bad. With no memories of real family or parents, he had nobody to miss, and although being an orphan wasn't great, he had few complaints. Perhaps it was because he was too young to understand his predicament fully yet.

"Ryuichi, come inside" the orphanage volunteer, Aiko called to him. Ryuichi leapt off the swings and sprinted towards her, hugging her middle. He liked Aiko. She was always kind and sweet to him and smelt of strawberries. She smiled and ruffled his hair gently.

"We have a new friend coming in today, I'd like you to come meet her, Ryuichi" Ryuichi gave a nod and allowed Aiko to lead him to the front of the house. Little did he know that Aiko had pre-planned this meeting, foreseeing that none of the other children would take to Aimi like Ryuichi would. He had an open, friendly nature, not tainted by cruelty and not dissuaded by silence or indifference. She predicted that Aimi would make few friends here, with her sulking looks and general indifference to other children.

"Ryuichi, this is Aimi, Aimi, this is Ryuichi" said Aiko, as they approached where Aimi was stood, waiting to be introduced. Aimi cast Ryuichi a sullen look and turned away. Ryuichi noticed the slight but ignored it. He was like that.

"Hi, I'm Ryuichi," he said "nice to meet you."

Aimi ignored him, turning her head away. She was obviously full of pride. Ryuichi gave a small laugh. Aimi stared as though she had never encountered a reaction like that before.

"What?" she shouted "why are you laughing at me?"

"You look cute when you're mad" said Ryuichi with another laugh, and taking Aimi by the hand, he led her outside, the other children parting the way and staring in amazement at the confident young boy and his reluctant new friend.

* * *

Ryuichi was eleven, Aimi was ten.

"Where are we going, Ryu?" Aimi cried. Yet again Ryuichi had her hand and was leading her somewhere.

"Someplace I want you to see Ai, it's super pretty at night"

Aimi shook her head reluctantly.

"It sounds like a waste of time to me, plus if the attendants catch me sneaking around again…you know they're always trying to frame me for something…"

"That's cuz none of the other kids like you, you're always making trouble, Ai"

"Not my fault" Aimi said, her jaw tight "stupid Soutu, teasing me. He deserves every bruise I gave him"

"You gave him more than bruises" Ryuichi said quietly. Aimi shrugged.

"All the kids are scared of you now, Aimi"

"You're not" Aimi observed.

"Cuz I know you're not gonna hurt me," Ryuichi replied, gently squeezing her hand "look, we're here!"

He had lead her to a section of the roof over the orphanage. It had a fantastic view. The night sky was clear and the stars were shining brilliantly.

"Wow" said Aimi, her eyes wide with wonder. Ryuichi smiled, Aimi rarely expressed genuine emotion except for hate or anger. He liked seeing her happy for once.

"Like it?" said Ryuichi with a grin. Aimi gave a small nod and then sat down. Ryuichi joined her. They spent a few moments like that, in silence.

"Hey, Ai"

"Yeah, what?"

"You had your first kiss yet?"

Aimi turned and glared at him

"What do you think?" she cried angrily. Ryuichi gave his characteristic laugh.

"So that's a no then? Haha!"

"Don't!" said Aimi threateningly, her hands curling up into fists.

"Want your first kiss?" said Ryuichi teasingly, and without waiting for a reply, he leant over and kissed Aimi full on the mouth.

* * *

Aimi was thirteen, Ryuichi was fourteen. Three years had made a huge difference to both of their bodies. Aimi's figure was taller, leaner. For the last four years she had dedicated herself to practising martial arts in the small orphanage backyard, her body becoming fit and toned.

It was a shadow of the well-built body she was to have still at nineteen, and her face was already grown-up. She looked older than thirteen. Her adult facial features were already shaping her face and she was incredibly pretty, if not for the usual scowl she usually wore.

Ryuichi was watching her practise. He too had changed. His height had shot up dramatically; he was tall for a fourteen year old. His face, like Aimi's, was older than his age. It was clear he was going to be an exceedingly attractive young man. His body build was slim and not powerfully built like Aimi's. It was obvious that she practised, whilst he watched. He was not the fighting type.

Aimi was kicking a punch-bag she had brought with her allowance. The orphanage owners were unsure at first whether to allow her to have it, after all the violence she had exhibited. Nobody had ever been fatally wounded or injured by her beyond recovery, but they had never taken in an orphan who had caused so much fighting and trouble. They had eventually decided to let Aimi have her way, in hope that she may take out her anger on the punch-bag instead of the other kids. They also couldn't help observing that the only other person who had never complained of Aimi once was Ryuichi. Aiko's predication had been correct. Ryuichi seemed to be a good influence on Aimi. He seemed to be the only one unafraid of her.

Nobody had ever come to adopt either Aimi or Ryuichi. Every other orphan around them had been taken in by foster families by now, to soon be replaced by new, younger orphans. Only Aimi and Ryuichi were consistently there, rejected by all of society except each other. Aimi had known from the beginning the chances of being adopted were slim…who would want a troubled girl like her? The workers at the orphanage had expected Ryuichi to be adopted, yet it never had happened, and now he was unlikely to be adopted because of his age.

"Nice moves Aimi" Ryuichi cried from his seat. Aimi did not smile, but continued pummelling the punch-bag. Ryuichi gave a grin and stretched out.

"Yo, Aimi, want a drink?" Aimi couldn't ignore a direct appeal like she could a general statement.

"No" she said shortly. Ryuichi shrugged and opened a can of his and Aimi's favourite drink, Go Go Lemonade. They drunk it frequently together, and had shared many great memories with it, like the time that Aimi had dared Ryuichi to drink a whole can in one, resulting in him accidentally snorting some out through his nose. Ryuichi could never forget how much Aimi had laughed at that, he had never seen her laugh so much before, or since. She was so pretty when she laughed.

"Hey Aimi…what do you wanna do when we get out of here?" Aimi paused for a moment, considering the question.

"I don't know…maybe join a martial arts school….I wanna learn weapon's training…like that man on TV the other day…with that weapon…" she trailed off. Ryuichi remembered it well. There had been a weapons display on that he and Aimi had seen on the tiny orphanage TV. The man had wielded a weapon with a long chain and a spiky ball on the end. Aimi had been transfixed by it, and even Ryuichi, who had little interest in things like that, found it amazing to watch.

"That's cool" Ryuichi said.

"What about you?" Aimi asked.

"Dunno…become a model or something" Ryuichi said with a wink.

"Hilarious" Aimi said dryly, resuming her punching. Ryuichi smirked, unaffected by her remarks, as he had been for eight years. He and Aimi were constant companions, you rarely saw one without the other. Aimi offered Ryuichi a new viewpoint. Good-looking, confident and already exhibiting the poise and self-assurance of the playboy he was to become, he would've undoubtedly become both vain and cocky, as well as unreasonably bored, without Aimi's presence. He too was the only one able to reassure her, understand her and never be intimidated by her. Even adults were scared of Aimi now. But Ryuichi never felt unsafe around her. They had built a wall around themselves and never let anyone in. Despite Ryuichi's flirtations with her, despite the first kiss they had shared, they were never anything more than best friends. Certainly neither Ryuichi or Aimi would have classed themselves as 'boyfriend and girlfriend' although outsiders would often think they were.

Ryuichi laid back in his seat and stretched. The sun was warm and the only sound he could hear was Aimi pounding the punch-bag. He felt himself dozing off.

"Well, you certainly are talented."

Ryuichi snapped awake, looking for the origin of the voice. Aimi had stopped fighting the punch-bag, and she had turned too, to look in its direction.

A young woman was stood beside the backyard's fence. She was incredibly pretty, and was wearing a full kimono, with her hair done-up neatly. Both Aimi and Ryuichi stared, it was rare to see a woman wearing full kimono here; they were living in a poor village on the outskirts of the city, and they had only really seen a kimono on TV. She was so elegant, so refined. Her eyes were watching Aimi carefully. Beside her were two men wearing masks across their eyes. It certainly was an unusual sight, but Aimi was the first to recover.

"How long have you been watching?" she demanded, her eyes narrowed at the intruders. Many thirteen year old girls would have recoiled at the sight of the woman and what appeared to be her two bodyguards, but not Aimi. She was fearless.

"Only a moment or two, but it is clear that you possess great talent in martial arts…imagine if you were to be trained…" the pretty lady smiled at Aimi, but Aimi continued glaring.

"Well, that's my dream." She said shortly, before turning away.

The elegant lady, however, clearly had no intention of leaving.

"So you are an orphan?" she asked "what's your name?"

"Aimi" Aimi replied shortly.

"Well then Aimi, how would you feel if I arranged for you to be taught martial arts properly?"

Aimi turned, her face eager.

"Teach me?"

"Indeed, and in weapons too. Talented young girls like you I do not see everyday" she stopped, and then muttered something inaudible to one of the men beside her, who gave a quick nod.

"Aimi, you will hear from me soon. Very soon." and with a brief smile, the elegant lady turned and walked away, the two men following closely behind.

Aimi walked to sit beside Ryuichi on the bench.

"You're quiet" she observed.

"That…that lady…are you really gonna be taken away?" Ryuichi said, biting his lip. Aimi gave a shrug.

"It's…it's not fair! You don't know who she is! She could be a killer for all you know!" Aimi smirked and said;

"Even if she was, I don't think I'd care much"

"What? Why?"

"Cuz she's gonna teach me to fight, like I always wanted"

"I don't like her" Ryuichi said bitterly, folding his arms. The thought of Aimi going away was unbearable to him.

"It's ok, Ryu," said Aimi softly "in three years you can get out of here anyway, and I'm sure we can still see each other and all."

Ryuichi shrugged and turned his face away, willing himself not to cry.

"And…even if we don't get chance to meet, once you're free from here you can come find me, right?" Ryuichi shrugged again.

Then Aimi did something she'd never done before, she leaned over, laid her head on Ryuichi's chest and leant on him. She could feel his heartbeat. It was incredibly comforting. His arms wrapped around her and they stayed like that for a period of time that neither could count exactly. It could have been five minutes, or it would have been fifty. The sun set around them and they both felt, although neither communicated this to the other, the terror of walking into an unknown future without each other.

* * *

It was a week later, and Aimi was leaving. She had few personal possessions, and few clothes. Everything she owned fitted in a medium-sized weekender bag. She was not sentimental by any means, and living in an orphanage had meant she didn't get chance to collect much like other girls her age. The only real treasure she kept was a worn baseball cap that Ryuichi had owned, and given to her. This was tucked amongst the rest of her clothes.

Normally, an adoption process would take ages to be confirmed, but not for Aimi. The lady who had asked to adopt her seemed so very eager and unwilling to have her orders disobeyed, and the orphanage owners so keen to get her off their hands, that the process had been rushed and completed in a very small space of time. The legality of it was questionable, but nobody seemed to care too much. The orphanage owners didn't even check the details of the woman properly. If they had, they may have thought twice about handing Aimi over, no matter how troublesome she was. The details were almost entirely false. Fake name, fake age, and a fake occupation. O-Ren may have been the queen of the Tokyo underground, but she certainly knew when to keep a low profile, and now Aimi was going to join her in a new life that she had no idea about yet.

Ryuichi was the last one to see her go. He was waiting by the orphanage front gate for her. O-Ren's car was waiting just beyond. Ryuichi hugged Aimi tightly, her hair brushing his face. She buried her face for a moment in his chest. Ryuichi had never seen Aimi cry, but this was probably the closest to it he had ever seen her. He tried to hold back his own, but Aimi had always been the more controlled of the two.

"Don't forget me, Ryu" Aimi said softly, her hand in his.

"I won't. I never, ever will" he said, and he meant it.

"I'll see you in the future, sometime…don't cry as you watch me leave, ok Ryu?"

"Yeah…"

They hugged one last time and then Aimi made her way out of the gates. A man was waiting to see her into O-Ren's car. He opened the door and she stepped inside.

Ryuichi watched from the gates. He was true to his word. He didn't cry watching her leave. It was later, alone in his room that he buried his face in his pillow and sobbed for the girl he loved and may never see again.

* * *

Inside O-Ren's car was spacious and well ventilated. It was more of a compact limousine than anything. O-Ren was not driving, but she had been sat on the backseat, waiting for Aimi to sit beside her.

"Are you excited, Aimi?"

"Yeah, I am"

"But sad to leave, too?"

"Not particularly, the orphanage meant little to me…" but she faltered before she could say anymore.

"What about that boy? You seemed close" Aimi gave a non-committal shrug, but decided that that wasn't enough. "He was my friend…my only friend, really." O-Ren gave a nod in understanding.

"Well, I am sorry that you may never see him again." Aimi's eyes focused on her lap, not wanting to respond to O-Ren's words. The car was speeding through the roads now. Aimi was worried that O-Ren would want to talk or ask questions about Ryuichi, but she said nothing more about him.

"I also think you should change your name, this is a new start for you, Aimi. What would you like your name to be?"

Aimi paused for a moment, thinking. She had never been particularly attached to the name 'Aimi', it seemed too feminine, too beautiful, for a monster like her. But it reminded her of Ryuichi, who often shortened it to 'Ai'. She wanted a name that would remind her of him, in any way. She remembered their favourite drink, the 'Go Go Lemonade' they had consumed in copious amounts. She remembered the most she had ever laughed in her life, when Ryuichi had it coming out of his nose. Perhaps that was one of her favourite memories, if Aimi had ever stopped to consider it.

"Gogo," said Aimi "I want to be called Gogo."

"Gogo?" O-Ren asked. The driver gave a snort of laughter, but was quickly silenced by a look from O-Ren.

"Yes…my name will be Gogo" Aimi said defiantly. When she had made her mind up she was very stubborn. O-Ren nodded and offered no resistance.

"Gogo it is. Welcome to the family, Gogo Yubari."

And the name Aimi was never mentioned between them again. The orphanage owners were so glad to see the back of the thirteen year old that her papers were stuffed in the bottom of the filing drawers, and her name never mentioned again. If not for Ryuichi, it would be as if the girl named Aimi had never existed.

**Thank-you for reading, I hope you enjoyed it. Next chapter will be up soon, and quicker if you leave some feedback, so please review! Thanks again! **

**Selphie Ivy**


	4. Growing Pains

Growing Pains: chapter 4

By Selphie Ivy

It was a week after being taken in by O-Ren that Ryuichi's suspicions had confirmed. Firstly, that they would not see each other again. Secondly, that the pretty lady who had adopted Aimi could be a killer.

Within a week of thirteen year old Aimi being adopted, she had already seen O-Ren kill. Nobody acted like it was anything major; killing seemed to be the norm in the life O-Ren had brought her into.

The man O-Ren had killed was an assassin, trying to murder her first. His skills didn't match O-Ren's. He was dead within moments. Gogo knew she should have felt scared, seeing someone die in front of her, but she felt little except a mounting sense of excitement. That she had been brought into this dark, dangerous world made her heart pound with excitement. Her life wasn't going to be a waste anymore; everyday was going to give her a thrill. The only regret she left at the orphanage was Ryuichi, who she couldn't help but think of every night, as she lay in bed.

Right after Gogo had witnessed the fight between O-Ren and the assassin, and had seen him die, O-Ren waited until they were safely escorted to the car. She sat beside Gogo in the back and started to explain. She had not had chance to yet describe to Gogo the life she had brought her into. She had been planning to tell her all after a month or two, but the assassin's death meant she would have to tell her all now.

Gogo listened intently to O-Ren. Listened to how O-Ren ran a large portion of the Tokyo underground. How she was a top assassin herself, a killer. How she had been hoping to find herself a new bodyguard, a young boy or girl of around thirteen, to train intently, so in a few years their talent would be unrivalled and they would be a formidable bodyguard. Her search had been in vain until, by mistake, she had spotted Gogo training outside. An orphan was a good sign. There were no parents to tear the child away from, no family to destroy, or to come after the child later. And O-Ren had a gut feeling that Gogo was going to be a fantastic bodyguard.

After everything had been explained, O-Ren gave Gogo two options. O-Ren may have been fearsome, violent and formidable, but she was not so heartless as to condemn a thirteen year old to a life of crime that she wasn't willing to commit to. She told her that Gogo could either stay on, learn martial arts, weapons training and become her bodyguard, with incredible perks including an apartment when she reached sixteen, never having to worry about paying for food, clothes or other necessities, and also being able to attend, with O-Ren, various meetings, formal events and councils. Or Gogo could decide to get out right now, return to the orphanage and continue living there as normal, on the condition that Gogo was never to speak of O-Ren or what had happened ever again. If she did, and word got back, Gogo would be 'taken care of'.

It was not a difficult choice for Gogo. The only faltering moment in her decision was the thought of seeing Ryuichi, but she could not resist a life so full of what she loved. And to commit to it was not to give up Ryuichi forever, but rather for a while as she trained. And so she gave her full consent to O-Ren. She wanted to train as her bodyguard. O-Ren had already guessed her answer, but she was pleased when Gogo seemed so eager to commit. And so Gogo's training began…

It was three years later, and Gogo was sixteen. She has just finished escorting O-Ren for the day. It had been a typical Friday. Gogo had trained in the meteor hammer. She had escorted O-Ren to a council meeting. She had escorted her to lunch with a few select members of the crazy 88s. Then she had been busy taking driving lessons from Miki. O-Ren wanted her to be able to drive as soon as she turned seventeen. Gogo didn't think she needed the classes, but O-Ren had insisted and so she had bent to her master's will. After driving, Gogo had escorted O-Ren again, this time to an underground club where the owner owed O-Ren money. Being an old friend, O-Ren had wanted to go there herself. The outcome didn't require much force or any violence, and so Gogo's day had passed without a single stain of blood on her usual clothing of choice, a schoolgirl uniform.

She was in her promised apartment, undressing. She laid her clothes on the bed and went to shower. After she had finished she dried herself and her hair, and then dressed herself again, in a fresh set of schoolgirl clothes. She wore little but that; it had become her trademark now. She glanced at the time. It was 10:07, and she was going out. She slipped a small, compact knife into her shoe and then she was ready. She was out of the door almost instantly.

Most clubs wouldn't let a sixteen year old in, but Gogo was heading to a place where they didn't even ask. The dark underbelly of Tokyo had plenty of illegal clubs where minors could enter with no questions. Some she became aware of through O-Ren's involvement in them, meaning that Gogo's connection to her was recognised and respected. The club she was going to was called 'Hideki's' and the bouncer waved her in immediately. It was fairly early, so Gogo took a seat at the bar and grabbed a drink. One drink turned into two, then three, then four. Binge drinking was quite a hobby of Gogo's, and Friday night meant she could go pretty crazy. As she drank, the club slowly filled. It was not a place for a nice, innocent girl, but Gogo could take care of herself. Pimps and their whores were there, some drunk twenty-something's were taking crack in the corner. Most people were either smoking, taking drugs or drunk. The dance-floor was overflowing with guys and girls, a fair few of whom were making out in such a vigorous way it wouldn't have been tolerated at the average club.

Gogo was an outsider to the action happening around her. She watched everyone around her intently, but never showed any signs of wanting to participate. A few guys would edge up next to her at the bar, as usual. Gogo was used to this, she had had a wide range so far. The youngest was a boy her age, who had been visibly awed by her. The oldest was a guy in his forties, who had attempted to grope her before Gogo promptly knocked out his front teeth. The bouncers escorted him, not her, out. The bouncers knew Gogo, and O-Ren, and were too scared to attempt to force Gogo out of the club. It was best to just ban the guys she clashed with or attacked.

The night continued. Gogo continued drinking, she had been drinking so much recently that it seemed to have little effect on her. She had never been a light-weight, and even after a copious amount of alcohol she still felt quite sober. A fight broke out on the dance-floor. Gogo watched nonchalantly, only half-interested in the mindless violence. Unless she was a part of it, it couldn't command her full attention, and it was merely a dance-floor scuffle, nothing involving the brutality Gogo was used to witnessing on an almost daily basis.

After the fight broke apart, Gogo downed a final drink before hoisting herself down from the barstool and heading outside. After leaving the club, she turned a corner and found herself in a dark back-alley. She had purchased a pack of cigarettes earlier and she now pulled them out, before realising she had forgotten a lighter. Swearing, she was interrupted by a leering voice.

"Hey there, pretty girl"

Gogo turned immediately. A male, most likely in his early twenties, was approaching her. His eyes skimmed greedily over her legs and body before fixing on her face with a nasty grin.

He moved in an instant towards her, attempting to prise her hands against the wall and take control, but Gogo was too quick for him. She raised her knee to his groin and he keeled over. A second later and she had grabbed her compact knife and slashed out, aiming for the man's face. A gash appeared and he howled with pain, but that didn't stop Gogo drawing her fist back and punching him squarely on the face. He toppled over and was unconscious before he hit the floor.

Gogo flicked her bloodstained knife back in, before depositing it safely back inside her shoe. She then appraised her situation. The man was unconscious, but for how long? The gash she had inflicted was bleeding heavily. He would most likely need a lot of stitches. Or should she just finish him off? As she stood there considering her situation, a voice called from the end of the alleyway.

"Hey, what's happening here?" A male figure was approaching. Gogo reached instinctively for her knife, wondering if she was going to need to spill more blood to escape, when suddenly the man's face came into her eyesight. She has been wrong, it wasn't a man; it was a boy about her age, although his tall frame gave him the silhouette of a man. It may have been three years, but Gogo could not second-guess those features. It was Ryuichi.

It took Ryuichi only a moment longer than Gogo to realise. The shock of seeing her threw him for a moment. He could only gape in wonder. She had certainly grown up. She was a young woman now, a very beautiful, dangerous young woman. Her eyes were unsettling to watch, and her figure was fitter and taller than he had seen before. Gogo stared silently at him and observed the changes three years had done to Ryuichi; he too was taller, his facial features were that of a young man. His skin was perfect. His hair was groomed precisely. He looked like a male model.

Gogo was speechless. She turned the knife over in her hand wordlessly. Ryuichi glanced at it.

"You gonna stab me, Aimi?" she said gently.

Aimi. She had almost forgotten her old name, her old identity. She opened her lips to speak but no words came out, but Ryuichi didn't seem to need to hear anything. He stepped forward and grasped her in his arms, just as when they were thirteen and fourteen, and knew so little of the world. And now look at them! They knew too much of everything. Gogo had experienced ten lifetime's worth of violence and death in three years, but clutched in Ryuichi's arms she felt like that thirteen year old girl again, as though the last three years had been a dream and she was still in the orphanage, being held in Ryuichi's arms as he said goodbye.

Gogo had never cried before, but a single tear now escaped and as Ryuichi let go of her, his hands moved to her face and gently wiped away the tear. He looked at her, and she stared stonily back, determined not to let another tear escape.

"You grew into a beautiful girl, as I knew you would" said Ryuichi.

"That's coming from a male model, right?" Ryuichi gave a small laugh and quickly wiped his eyes, fearful that the emotions pounding through his body would be betrayed in his own tears.

"But, Aimi…what are you doing here? It's not a safe place for sixteen year old girls at night…" he trailed off and glanced down at the body beside them. He had only just remembered why he had been brought to the alley-way in the first place. He had heard a shout and, thinking it was a girl being attacked, he had come to help. Now he realised that the one who had shouted had been the attacker, as Gogo defended herself.

"I can take care of myself" said Gogo bluntly. And she replaced the knife she had held all that time to her shoe yet again. Ryuichi watched her, his worst fears confirmed. She had been trained as a killer. He had had a gut feeling all these years. The beautiful, elegant lady was not what she had seemed. For the last three years he often tossed and turned at night, wondering what had happened to Aimi and what she was doing now.

"I think you should come home with me" Ryuichi said quickly, as he bent down to check the man.

"No, let's go to mine. I can change then." Gogo's clothes were stained with blood.

"Ok then…he's just unconscious anyway," Ryuichi confirmed "he'll wake up soon…we better get going quickly…"

He took Gogo's hand in his and although she didn't quite hold as firmly as he would have hoped, she didn't pull away either, which was always a good sign.

They walked together, Gogo mainly leading as she knew the way. They barely talked. It was as though there was an unspoken agreement not to speak properly until they reached Gogo's apartment. They met very few people on the way, and thankfully, they met no police. They reached Gogo's apartment and made their way up. As soon as they were in her room Ryuichi burst into the speech he had felt too oppressed to say before;

"What are you doing Aimi, what did that lady make you do? You've been trained haven't you? Trained to kill?" Ryuichi asked desperately.

Gogo didn't reply at first.

"I've been trying to look you up for ages," Ryuichi continued "I left the orphanage at sixteen, started work and got myself a cheap place. I begged the orphanage people for the details of the lady, to figure where you'd gone. They eventually relented but all the information didn't seem to be right…"

"It was fake" said Gogo simply. Ryuichi stared in shock.

"What's happened, Aimi? I don't get it!"

Gogo gave a sigh, withholding information from Ryuichi would eventually be impossible now he had found her. Perhaps bringing him back here had been a bad idea…

"I'm a bodyguard. Of O-Ren, the woman who adopted me. Being able to kill is a requirement of my job…"

Ryuichi lowered his eyes to the floor.

"I always guessed…I just didn't want to believe it…you could've used your skills better, Aimi."

Gogo gave a shrug.

"All this time, I've been beating myself up about this. I shouldn't have let you go so easily…" Ryuichi raised his hand to grab his hair in apparent frustration "I regretted it as soon as you left. She wasn't legit, I knew that. And there were so many things I wanted to say before you left…"

"Like what?" Gogo said abruptly. Ryuichi paused and turned to look at her, feeling that perhaps right now wasn't the best time to illustrate his true feelings. A sudden other thought struck him.

"Aimi…have you been like, going out a lot, and drinking?"

"Sure, most weekends."

"Oh," said Ryuichi, trying to keep his face impassive "so, you've slept around a lot too?"

Gogo did not reply, but only shot him a glare. Ryuichi tried to keep his face impassive, trying to resist the sense of jealously throbbing through his veins. If someone else had done that…to his Aimi…

"What's wrong?" Gogo said, eyeing his suspiciously. Ryuichi's attempt to maintain indifference wasn't working.

"It's just…it's just…"

"You wanted to be my first?" Gogo said bluntly, now using a face towel to clean the small flecks of blood off her face. Ryuichi's jaw clenched. Gogo finished cleaning her face and sat down next to him. Ryuichi's face was flushed and he tried to avoid making eye contact, but Gogo's eyes were steady as she said;

"I'm still a virgin"

"Really?" Ryuichi asked in surprise. Gogo gave a nod. It wasn't that she had exactly chosen to remain a virgin, she just hadn't met a guy she wanted to screw in the last three years.

Standing up again, Gogo undid her shirt and started to tug it off. Ryuichi leapt up immediately.

"What are you doing?" he said quickly.

"Changing, I have blood on my clothes."

"In front of me?"

Gogo gave a shrug. Ryuichi shook his head and gallantly turned away. Gogo continued to undress, taking off her shoes, socks, placing the compact knife on her bedside table before undoing her skirt and slipping it off. Ryuichi remained turned away, his arms crossed.

"Ryuichi…" Gogo called gently.

"Yes?" he asked, still not turning.

"Turn around" she demanded. Ryuichi turned slowly. Gogo was wearing black underwear, and nothing else. He quickly tried to turn away again but she moved forward and grabbed his arm, forcing him to remain. He closed his eyes, partly to be courteous, partly because he was worried what he may do if he spent any longer looking at Aimi. His body was still pulsing from the amazement and joy of seeing her again. Moments later he felt her lips on his. He kissed back instinctively. He had not kissed her since they were young children, and the memory of this flashed freshly in Ryuichi's mind and made him reach out and clutch Aimi to him again, in such a fierce grasp an onlooker would have wondered if they were to ever break apart again. Ryuichi kissed her passionately and she kissed back, as though each wished to devour the other. Gogo stepped backwards, Ryuichi followed, still clutching her to himself, and they fell onto the bed.

They kissed frantically, as though they would never see each other again, and neither would let go of the other. Ryuichi kissed her lips, her cheeks, her forehead, her neck in a desperate passion. Gogo's hands moved to his shirt, which she swiftly unbuttoned, and kissed the chest underneath. In a moment his shirt was on the floor, quickly followed by his dark jeans, his shoes and his socks. They were now both in only underwear, and they continued kissing as though their very lives depended on it.

His arms still holding Gogo. Ryuichi raised his face from hers and looked into her eyes. He wanted confirmation.

"Are you sure?" he asked gently. Gogo gave a small nod. Ryuichi leant in to kiss her forehead and she moved her hands to his head, running her fingers through his hair.

That night, the sixteen year old Gogo lost her virginity to the seventeen year old Ryuichi. He knew it was her first time and was gentle with her. After, as they lay naked next to each other, he grasped her body close to him and could not sleep for the abounding happiness he felt, although he was uncomfortably aware that this happiness could be cut short if he was prevented from seeing Aimi again.

The next morning, his worst fears were confirmed. Gogo was living the life of a criminal, a yakuza. She had a life so separate and diverse to Ryuichi's, the difference seemed irreversible. It tore them apart. Gogo had woken up still in Ryuichi's arms, and even she, not known for a tendency to display strong emotions, felt grieved by what was to come. Last night had been one of the best nights of her life. She was thankful she had found Ryuichi. To lose her virginity to any other guy would have felt inadequate compared to losing it to Ryuichi, who she loved more thoroughly and completely than any other person on the planet, except perhaps for O-Ren.

When they both were awake and started to dress, Gogo told Ryuichi that they couldn't see each other again. The effect was immediate. His sorrow was displayed in his anger. He shouted at her, asking her why she had screwed with him if she never intended to see him again. Gogo's self-control had never been so tested. She wished to weep. Against every logical, rational thought, she longed to see Ryuichi again, but she knew it was impossible. They were from two different worlds, and O-Ren would never approve of him. She longed to tell him how she felt but she was too blunt, too ineloquent and unaccustomed to describing her emotions to put it in words. As a result, Ryuichi left in a rage, his heart broken, although his face was free of tears until he reached his own apartment. Once there, he raged like a madman, destroying everything in his sight, before succumbing to the inevitable tears. Gritting his teeth he made a decision. He would spend every waking moment in pursuit of girls; if he could not have Aimi then he would have every other girl he could have instead. Perhaps twenty girls combined could together have the qualities Ryuichi saw in Gogo, although he doubted it. The plan was formulated; he was to continue working for now in his crappy convenience store job. At night he was to scout the streets on a constant prowl, whilst studying the qualities a host must have. Already charming, eloquent, attractive and charismatic, he would emphasize each quality to become the top of his field, before becoming a host himself. If that was not to supply him with a constant distraction of beautiful women, he didn't know what job would. His simple, innocent dreams of becoming a model seemed so far away. His life course had been altered by that one fateful night with Aimi.

Back in her own apartment, Gogo was trying to convince herself that she had done the right thing. She loved Ryuichi. She tried to pretend she didn't. She lied to herself, but could not ignore the pounding of her own heart and the misery she had felt as he stormed out, raging and shouting at her. Running her fingers through her hair and willing herself not to cry, she crossed the room for a shower, hoping that that would make her feel better.


	5. The Black Widow

The Black Widow: chapter 5

By Selphie Ivy

Gogo was seventeen, Ryuichi, wherever he was, was eighteen. After that fateful night, Gogo had desperately tried to continue living as she had been, but it just wasn't working. Alcohol and smoking could not dull the pain, and so she turned to the one other resource which she believed would help her. Sex.

It had started casually. She picked a guy out in one of the many clubs she went to. There was certain criteria, but she almost always found a male matching the description she wanted. He had to be between eighteen to thirty. Tall, good-looking, with a good body. His personality didn't matter too much.

The first guy Gogo brought back after Ryuichi was called Hiroshi. He was about twenty one. He had been flirting constantly with Gogo in the bar. Before, Gogo would have acted defensively, even violently. But now it all fitted in with her plans. Hiroshi was obviously a bit of a playboy, and he was good in bed, but Gogo couldn't help but compare him to Ryuichi, who seemed superior in every sense. Angrily, she dismissed Hiroshi from her apartment as soon as possible the next morning and started again, this time targeting an attractive man she had seen frequently in one of the bars she often went too. He had dyed blonde-hair, and his name was Yoshikazu. He too was a bit of a playboy, he too was good in bed, but he too was a disappointment compared to Ryuichi. In desperation, Gogo tried a twenty five year old named Tatsuya, who had boy-band looks and charisma to go with it. Disappointment.

Taro, thirty, incredibly good looking, gym body. Disappointment.

Akeno, a male model, he had slept with a popular female singer in Tokyo at the time. Disappointment.

Gen, he had been young, only eighteen, he was incredibly gentle. Disappointment.

Kyung Tae, he was about twenty three, he was Korean, and in Tokyo trying to make it as an actor. Disappointment.

In desperation Gogo tried man after man, but although their names and ages varied, she never found one to match the passion and excitement Ryuichi had inspired in her. She gnashed her teeth, grew more violent, more angry. The men she bedded woke up in the morning to find Gogo raging, meaning they often made a quick escape. In her training she excelled. O-Ren had never seen a more brutal, more determined bodyguard. She excelled in the meteor hammer. She destroyed everything in her path with vicious efficiency, and at night became more and more of a predator. Stalking men out with ruthless intent, and disposing of them when she was done.

It was Shiro who pushed her to the edge. She had stalked him out in a large bar on a Thursday night. He was as attractive as the other men Gogo usually picked. He was about twenty two, and was a persistent flirt. Gogo did what was necessary and soon they were back at her place, kissing frantically, Shiro because of the expectation of what was to come, Gogo because she was desperately trying to manufacture the passion of the kiss with Ryuichi. She hadn't been able to recreate it with anyone else since he had left.

They were soon having sex. Shiro lay content beside Gogo afterwards, but Gogo only felt sickened. She hated this situation. She hated herself for doing what she was doing, and she really, _really _hated Shiro right now. Shiro saw the agitation in her face.

"What's up baby?" he said, his face relaxing into a playboy smile, his concern mostly insincere.

Gogo didn't really remember what happened next. But suddenly she was so overcome with rage, so sickened by her situation, so angered by disappointment after disappointment and misery at losing Ryuichi, that she had a knife in her hand and was driving it through Shiro's chest. He made a small noise of surprise before he keeled over, clutching where Gogo had stabbed him, his eyes wide with surprise. The suddenness and violence of the attack rendered him speechless. He was dead within thirty seconds.

Breathing hard, partly amazed by what she had done, Gogo quickly cleaned her knife and set out destroying the evidence of the killing.

Something had snapped in Gogo then, and suddenly the black widow style of killing became normal to Gogo. Every guy she slept with from then on soon became her victim. No man breathed for much longer after Gogo had decided she wanted to sleep with him.

It had been about six months after the night Ryuichi and Gogo had spent together when they were fated to meet again.

Ryuichi was at one of his favourite clubs. He had been true to his word. He had become a playboy. He was currently flirting with a beautiful young girl by the name of Minako. He was being charming, and she was fluttering her eyelashes at him. It wasn't long before Ryuichi lead her to the back of the club where they began kissing. Ryuichi kissed Minako with as much desperate passion as Gogo had with Shiro, with similar results. He could not force the feelings he had for Gogo with another girl. Every girl he had slept with since he could only compare to her, and he found them all inadequate. But still he continued kissing Minako. She was very small and skinny. She was wearing a red dress that Ryuichi was teasingly playing with the straps of.

It was an ordinary night out for Gogo. She had just slipped out of the back of the club to get some fresh air when she encountered a couple kissing fervently against the back wall. Not willing to be in their presence, Gogo retreated but not before the male looked up. It was Ryuichi. He was making out with a beautiful girl, who turned to look at Gogo with glaring eyes for interrupting them. Gogo felt sickened. She turned and quickly walked away, her chest pounding and her breathing unsteady. She had walked about ten metres when she felt a hand clasp around her arm.

"Aimi" she heard Ryuichi call, she felt so dizzy and confused that his voice sounded as though he was far away. His hand on her arm felt unreal.

Minako ran up to beside Ryuichi and began pestering him.

"What are you doing?!" she asked, her eyes narrowed at Gogo "who's this bitch?"

Thankfully, Ryuichi, anticipating it, reacted the quickest. He grabbed Minako and tugged her to the side, before Gogo's fist made contact.

"Crazy bitch!" Minako shrieked, and then turning to Ryuichi she cried "don't you wanna sleep with me?! Let's get out of here!"

"Sorry, changed my mind" said Ryuichi, instantly grabbing Gogo's arm back and pulling her out of the club. Minako stormed off, and within ten minutes had found a new guy to make out with.

Meanwhile, Gogo was lashing out at Ryuichi outside.

"What the fuck, Ryuichi!" she cried, her voice unsteady from anger. She had never lashed out at Ryuichi properly before, but she had never felt so angry in all her life.

"Calm down, calm down," said Ryuichi hastily, glancing around "plus, don't tell me you haven't been sleeping around too."

Gogo clenched her jaw, too angry for words.

"Come on," said Ryuichi, beckoning for her to follow him "aren't you glad we got to see each other again?"

Gogo didn't reply.

They started walking, in what direction neither knew, but they were beside one another.

It would have been impossible for an outsider to understand how they both felt at that moment. Ryuichi was ecstatic that he had gotten to see Gogo again, felt guilty that Gogo had seen him with Minako, but then felt a certain defiance when he remembered how many guys Aimi must have slept with since, as well as a pang of jealousy. He also felt confused about what was to happen now. Gogo felt angry, jealous and also slightly guilty that Ryuichi's words were true; she had slept with many others since him, although he had been undoubtedly the most sincere and passionate lover. She didn't know whether she wanted to kiss him or kill him, or something in between. She also felt a certain sense of longing, and (although she would never admit it) a relief that she had managed to find him again; that she was walking beside him now.

They silently continued for a while, each wanting to know what the other was thinking but neither willing to betray their own feelings. Darkness had surrounded the underbelly of Tokyo, only broken by flashes of neon nights. Ryuichi gritted his teeth and prepared himself for the next question.

"Wanna go in there?" he asked, pointing to a building with lights still on. A sign above the door announced it was named 'Lover Two'.

"A love hotel?" Gogo asked, looking at Ryuichi.

"I'm not implying anything," said Ryuichi quickly "just saying that from what I remember, your place is a fair way from here…too much to walk, and since I moved from my apartment, I'm ages away too…" Ryuichi's logic certainly wasn't plausible. If they could pay for a love hotel, they could pay for a taxi, but he was guessing, hoping, that Aimi was thinking the same thing as he was.

Gogo considered it for a moment. She knew what was going to happen, and she didn't know if it was technically a good idea, but her whole body longed for Ryuichi as much as his longed for hers. And she didn't just want a physical act of passion, she craved the affection he had shown to her that one night…but never, ever would Gogo ever admit she felt such things.

"Sure" she said, trying to keep her face impassive, and together they went in.

It was much like before, perhaps a little more straightforward. Two people who want each other as passionately as Ryuichi and Gogo did can not be kept apart for long once reunited. Ordering the room their hands brushed. On the lift up their bodies brushed. By the time the lift had reached the top, Ryuichi and Gogo were locked together in an embrace. Seconds later and they were into their room, the door shut and locked and in under a minute both had taken all their clothes off and were in each other's arms again. It was as good as last time, if not better. They had both had so many failed attempts to fabricate the genuine passion with others that they had felt with each other before, that to be close to one another, to feel the realness of their feelings again, was elation to both.

This next time Ryuichi and Gogo would sleep with each other after this, he would leave his number for her, telling her that even monsters like them could be happy, if they were to love each other. But for now the two lovers were unaware of what was to come. They seemed to know nothing but each other, as they both embraced the passion and fervour that they had been unable to find in any other lover they had taken.


End file.
